Draft Advert (2) 20/20 Life Drawing

This is the second advert draft for 20/20. We are happy with the punchline for this advert as it works effectively however there are technical alterations needed.

- The scene of the main character coming out of the curtains jumps straight to her walking down the corridor. The continuity here is not good and therefore we will alter this and instead of using curtains, she will change in a door that says 'female changing' and then walk out into the corridor.

- In the clip of her entering the room, the door used has no glass window, however in the last clip when she is shown through the door it is obvious it is not the same door. To overcome this problem we will have to film using a different door with a window. We will then use match on action to make it seem though she has entered through the same door.

- The characters who are shocked when she enters do not look as though they are grieving, nor do they look particularly surprised. To resolve this, we will have them sobbing, spluttering, mascara down their faces and a box of tissues. This use of mis-en-scene makes it more obvious as to what the setting is. 

- When entering the room, she is not in the shot so when filming the actual piece we will make it so she is more towards the centre.

-There is also an issue with proximity as she appears to be too close to the group- her feet are too close to the people in the circle. To fix this, we will ensure she is at a reasonable distance.

-The narrative is not that clear and therefore we will add a clip in the beginning for explanatory purposes. The dialogue will be as following:
Main character: Hi, I'm here  for the life drawing class
Receptionist: Great, go and change into your robe and then read the sign on the door for life drawing

Our TV advert

Here, we brainstormed the theorists that can be applied to our media product!

A2 media draft advert(1)

This is the draft for our advert for 20/20 and after shooting this, we realise that there are a number of alterations to be made. We followed the storyboard when filming, however when put into practice there were numerous shots that we need to alter, lengthen or add in. Firstly, there are some continuity issues including:

1. The camera angle is straight on in one shot and slanted in the next.
2. The paint moves place
3. She picks up a different toothbrush

Another aspect of this that we will alter is the narrative; we want her to seem as though she is in more of a rush. To do this we will show her grabbing her bag and a short clip of her getting dressed because the scene from her in the bathroom to straight out of the door jumps too quickly. We are also not going to show Kate brushing her teeth as we want the paint on her teeth to be the punchline at the end. Instead a clip from behind showing the action is enough to explain to the audience what is happening. The first 6 seconds will be filmed at night in the actual film to create a sense of realism as the lighting will be darker. Another clip we will add in is Kate turning off the light as the black out we have used in the draft is not enough to indicate that it is the next morning. The added sound effect of a birdsong in the morning in addition to the light change will be more o an obvious indication. For the last scene of her walking down the road, we need the clip to be longer as 'Should've gone to 20/20' does not appear for long enough and it ends quite awkwardly. Finally, there is a lack of brown paint on her teeth that can be easily altered as we didn't have any chocolate spread on the day but will make sure we do next time!